Some Do's and Dont's of Online Dating

Anyone who says online dating is a good way to find your soul mate is a lying retard and a loser. If you are online trying to find your significant other it only means that you have gone past rock bottom and are destined to live your life alone and die a loner's death. Honestly if you weren't such a woman repeller your family or friends might have succeeded in getting you married in a arranged way or you yourself might have successfully struck the right chord with someone already, and since you have not, it doesn't take rocket science to predict the happenings in the future of your non existent love life. I know you are one stubborn son of a gun and are bent upon making someone miserable for the rest of their life, so here are some do's and dont's of online dating.

DON’T be a Poser
The info highway is cramped with losers like you so stop pretending that you are not. Just be you lame self and someone might actually, even out of pity give you a second thought. The person on the other side of the monitor is just as big a loser as you are so why pretend?

Post your own Face
Be true to yourself and your creator and post your own pics, no matter how terribly fugly they might be. Posting fake pictures is considered as a shenanigan and will get you no where (like you are going places). Remember even negative publicity is a form of publicity itself so if a flattering picture can attract eyes, so can a butt ugly one. And one more thing, no risque photos, if no body wants to see your face, showing them your private parts will not win them over.

The First Step
Don't start your communications with a big whiny statement. Stop draining energy from the person you are communicating with by boring them with your sad stories, nobody wants to listen to the pathetic stories concerning your past or your life altogether. Be positive, but not HIV positive. I know being positive is not your thing but you can at least try. Don't be afraid to fail, if it doesn't work out don't admit to being a loser, call her a skank and move on to the next one.

DON’T be too Desperate
You might not be familiar with what a woman's touch feels like but that doesn't give you an excuse to act like a happy fool and start blurting your personal information out as soon as you talk to one. Someone might try to kill you in an attempt to rid the world of ugly if you give out your address to every crazy girl/woman/lady/trany you get in touch with online. Protecting yourself at all times is essential as people need to see the difference between pretty and horrific.

DO be a Clingy Doormat
Just when you manage to engage yourself in a serious relationship, don't ruin it all by not being a whipped, clingy, ultra sensitive doormat of a man. Don't take it slow, remember slow and steady wins the race but in your case mentally slow and steadily crazy will not make you a winner so just hang on to her like dear life. Don't make the same mistake of thinking that you are someone again, keep reminding yourself that you are a nobody and thank your lucky stars that someone has agreed to be in a relation ship with you and start worshiping them immediately.

DO lookout for Scams
Just because a supposed to be girl seems interested in you should not get you too excited. There are many online scams designed specifically for dumb desperado's like you, so watch out for them. If someone asks you for money or your bank accounts details to be your "friend", straight away tell them that you are a sad little excuse for a human being with no money and no potential. Tell them you have all the traits of a millionaire, you are bald, middle aged, extremely desperate for loving except you don't have a million bucks. This will surely scare all the scams away. 

These are but just some of the tips i am giving to helpless losers, so don't act like a wise ass, take my advice and turn your life around for the better.